Back then, and Vitamins

Yesterday I went to the doctor, cause since Sunday, I had this stomach pain and no matter what I ate, couple minutes past, I threw the entire thing up, until I could smell that throat scratching stain from the stomach acid. When I was at the doctor I had to tell her everything about my stomach problem. Also I finally told her whats up with me having sleeping problems for a while now, and my concentration is down the hole. Okey the last part was just made up. I just told her this, hoping she would subscribe me, the Methylphenidat ( a higher dose of Ritalin) medication again. That way I would stop having hunger attacks right in the middle of the day. I remember falling into this thing called, Anorexia cause of that medication. And the best part is, I didn’t even lost weight on purpose. I remember my teacher once asking me to have a talk with him, and he was asking me how I was doing, cause he was worried about me, I’d didn’t make a lot of friends, and it looked like I lost a lot of weight and thats basically the best part I remember from this whole 15 minute wanna-be encourage-able talk. So then suddenly I  noticed, everybody, my Mom (who barely had time for me at that tine) my at-that-time Best friend,  and basically all others, started talking to me and wondering why I lost such big amount of weight, and to be completely honest, I loved the attention, even if the reason was actually a very bad one. At that point I stoped eating, cause I didn’t hang out with much people in school, or at any time in the week. Plus I was being bullied anyway, so why would I want to hang out at lunch or anytime with those stupid peeps anyway? Come to think of it, I just saw two of these girls back in the city when I went shopping. Oh yeah I like to shop on my own, cause then you don’t have those stupid girl problems, or your friend telling you, “OMG you gotta buy this” or “Try this, or this” And you just spend less money when you’re on your own. (Well not really. I really really like to buy things, even if its just kept, like a Die-Hard-Fan action figure collector, who would never open up the box) But these girls didn’t even recognize me, and to be honest I sure was glad. And looking upon them like a normal human being, walking around, I was wondering if they where still those horrible kinds, even after all these years. The way they dressed hasn’t changed, so I assume that their Character hasn’t changed either. Cause I changed the way I dress myself, like 5 times since those years. Cause I would never want to look as stupid as I did, at that time. So the attempt to get this medication back failed, bad enough, cause one moment to the other we where talking about my tiredness and my doctor wanted to let my blood be taken. and today her assistant who took my blood, called me and told me that I have a very low amount of Vitamin D, which I always thought people in Norway or somewhere where the sun is no where to be seen, have. So tomorrow I made an appointment and I really wish I could give myself a few more Face-palms, because I made it on 7:30 a.m. Shit and tomorwo I could have slept in, like the last 3 days. Well at least I can see the rest of the day, and not lose the entire day by sleeping i until 1:45 p.m like I did today. Oh first me I needed the sleep, cause I didn’t for more than 48 hours. Its my first week of being able to have the rest of my medications on my own, and its running really bad. I like, barely take any of these Meds, only maybe the one who puts me to sleep. But I forgot this one two, so I could just watch one more movie of Danielle Panabaker. (she plays Caitlin Snow on the series The Flash) Once I find a new Actress favii, I  stared searching everything about this person from where they grew up, to the first and last apperance of anything. Like a terrible stalker, except without the creepy part like , showing up at their window at night, even if I knew where they’d live, maybe just maybe I think I would freak out a bit. So thats basically it for today. Oh bad thing today, I forgot to flush the toilet, which never ever happened to me, and my Apartii (since its not a roomie, because we share an apartment not a room) got real pissed of at me. She told me this and how mad she is, for me to have taken her mini snicker bar. like real M I N I. Of course I don’t have the guts, and the emotional barrier  to talk back or stand up for myself. I always just hope that next time I get it right, stay out of her way and maybe just clean the entire apartment so I could make it up to her and we would be good. Don’t worry I’ll buy you back, more than just one stupid mini snicker.

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